Christmas on PlusNet
Article posted on Tuesday, 20-Dec-2005 18:11 PM
Courtesy of Dave Hookham the UserGroup are proud to present a tongue-in-cheek festive poem
We would like to wish all PlusNet, F9, Free-Online and MetroNet customers and Staff a Very Merry Christmas - and here's looking forward to a fast, reliable and better-communicated new year!
Mr Hookham Presents
Christmas On PlusNet
'Twas Christmas on Plusnet, when all through the night
Not a kb was passing, not even a byte;
Contact Us tickets were completed with care,
But the responses suggested it was the users software
The 1% were all tucked up in their beds,
No need for the net when they're cuddling their teds;
Since according to Plusnet, there is no cap
And Premier users thought they'd a clean tap,
Maybe, they thought, the pipe needs to be fatter,
Or it's the users... yes, definitely the latter.
With MACs at the ready, they left like a flash
Repaying the subsidy? Good grief... lack of cash
Waving fingers as they leave, elsewhere did they go,
Telling all who would listen, their sad tale of woe
When, what to their shock and surprise should appear,
But Plusnet, out shopping with change from their beer.
Acquisition, it seems, is the name of the game
Buying up other companies, without as much fame.
More rapid than eagles, the boss, in he came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, Ratty! now, Radiac! Now, Rachel you vixen!
Off, Furby! Off ++ChAoS++! Off, Dan's World of Sin!
To another provider! To the ends of the earth
Chalk up another to the cull of the Smurf.
To the rest of the users, I have something to say
It was as valid back then as it still is today.
"Be grateful you lot, or I'll be back in a tick,
Ready to take action, armed with my Big Stick."